Mom vs. Dad

"It is the blood of the Lunas to be quiet, for only a quiet man can learn the secrets of the earth that are necessary for planting- They are quiet like the moon- And it is the blood of the Márez to be wild, like the ocean from which they take their name, and the spaces of the llano that have become their home."

     I waited, then said. "Now we have come to live near the river, and yet near the llano.  I love them both, and yet I am of neither. I wonder which life I will choose?"

     "Ay, hijito," she chuckled, "do not trouble yourself with those thoughts.  You have plenty of time to find yourself-"

     "But I am growing," I said, "every day I grow older-"

     "True," she replied softly.  She understood that as I grew I would have to choose to be my mother's priest or my father's son.

(Rudolfo Anaya, Bless Me, Ultima, 41)

Latino or no, coming-of-age stories are not hard to find.  The example of Bless Me, Ultima has the added element of one parent versus the other.  Antonio feels that he must choose to become either like his mother's side of the family (calm, settled, religious farmers) or like his father's (rowdy, free-spirited, indifferent vaqueros).  The idea of parental polarization goes way back:

(source)

"Y crecieron los niños, y Esaú fue diestro en la caza, hobre del campo; pero Jacob era hombre quieto, que habitaba en tiendas.  Y amó Isaac a Esaú, porque comía de su caza; mas Rebeca amaba a Jacob."  Génesis 25:27-28

We see similar parallels from the Old Testament:  the outdoorsy hunter is loved by the father while the quiet son is loved by the mother.  Another very similar example can be found in the character Jack from the movie The Tree of Life:

The premise of this movie is virtually the same as Bless Me, Ultima, just set in a small, 1950s American town.  A quote from this trailer says, "There are two ways through life - the way of nature and the way of grace.  You have to choose which one you'll follow."

Jack's father teaches him the way of nature - survival of the fittest.  To succeed, one must be strong and willing to fight, no matter the cost.  "It takes fierce will to get ahead in this world," says the father.  On the other hand, his mother teaches him the way of grace.  She teaches love, faith, and an appreciation for the world.  "Unless you love, your life will flash by."

I think Antonio Márez's feelings can be summed up perfectly in the quote from the trailer, "Father, Mother - always you wrestle inside me.  Always you will."  (Remember Jacob's coming-of-age wrestling match?)  It seems that Antonio and Jack think that they only have two choices, that they can either become like their mother or their father.  Are those the only choices - is there no happy medium?  Or can these two philosophies somehow be reconciled?